NEW YORK (CBS 2) — Finding your soul mate at any age can be a challenge, but it doesn’t get any easier when you get older.
With the high divorce rate, though, many singles are still out there – and they’re hoping to find the love of their live the second time around, reports CBS 2’s Katie Fehlinger.
Laurence Sanchez said she knows what she’s looking for.
“Someone that would care for me and my kids, like I would care for them as well,” she said.
As a divorced mother, though, she said dating is more complicated.
“Many women my age, above 44, have children and they come as a package,” Sanchez said.
“I expected to be with the same man my entire life,” Liz, a Greenwich resident who asked CBS 2 not to use her last name, said.
Liz is a designer, performer and a single mother. Now, at age 53, she’s dating again – and it’s a whole new ballgame.
“Suddenly, 25 years later, you kind of don’t know where to start,” she said. “You’re in a whole new realm of this whole social world. It was scary.”
Experts, however, say older daters have one big advantage.
“The older we get, the more experience we have,” relationship coach Ann Robbins said. “Some call it baggage. I call it experience.”
These days, it’s also easier for people to make a connection. Dating sites now target singles in their 50s, 60s and beyond.
“The technology is so different, and the nature of dating has changed so much,” relationship expert Dr. Jane Greer said. “Things speed up so quickly.”
So how do you get started when you’re too old for the club scene, but too young for the senior center? Dr. Greer said you need to get serious.
“It’s not going to just happen as quickly or as spontaneously as it might have when you were younger,” she said.
Dr. Greer said it’s important to get out there, and to get involved. Finding activities that you enjoy doing, and that broaden your horizons, could also expose you to a potential partner.
“Even if you’re not necessarily going to meet ‘the person’ that you want to date, you may make a new friend,” Dr. Greer said.
Dr. Greer said older daters should be proactive, and shouldn’t be afraid to make the first move. They should keep an open mind when they meet someone and, believe it or not, always remember to smile, she said.
“It’s something so small, and so simple, but it completely changes the energetic exchange, and it completely gives a different message,” Dr. Greer said.
“So far, it is fun. I do not know how long, but so far it is fun,” Sanchez said.
“I believe in love…totally,” Liz said.
Above all, experts said that older daters shouldn’t be discouraged. It’s all about checking people out to see if they’re a good fit – don’t worry about people possibly rejecting you.