Nina In New York: Dream A Little Dream
A young professional's take on the trials and tribulations of everyday life in New York City.
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By Nina Pajak
Really Big Deal: Scientists at UC Berkeley have actually figured out a way to record visual activity in our brains and translate it into video we can watch.
Let me put that another way: THEY CAN SEE OUR DREAMS.
No, seriously! Listen, they've invented this computer program which can take information gathered from MRI scanning and read the brain activity in the visual cortex, and using blahbadyblahblah science science science (here's a much more comprehensive explanation), interpret and reconstruct the results into a movie clip. And even at these relatively early stages, the final product is not just a bunch of wacky, colorful Rorschach blobs on a screen. They're actually generally recognizable, mushy, blobby versions of real images. Like you're watching something drunk or on hallucinogenics or without your glasses on, or with someone else's glasses on.
So if right now this program requires hours spent in an MRI machine and results in some pretty impressive blobs, imagine where it'll be in five years, or even less.
I don't know about you, but I think this is WILD. Then again, it also scares the bejesus out of me.
Consider how many freaky dreams you have in a month. And those are just the ones you remember. I, for one, am not entirely sure I want to know all the details of my imagined Indiana Jones-style adventure with Johnny Depp and my fourth grade teacher and my best friend who then turns into my worst friend who then turns into a subway conductor who then turns into Al Pacino and then my dentist. My brain comes up with some crazy stuff at night, and it's probably some sort of self-preservation instinct that I'm not privy to most of it in my waking hours. Imagine how fast you'd fall off the deep end if you rewatched yourself falling off a building or making out with your middle school ex or being chased down by Gwyneth Paltrow, who turns out to be a vampire.
Not only that, but what about those dreams in which you do things you shouldn't be doing with people you shouldn't be thinking about? Having that type of evidence laying around for a significant other to stumble upon is a disaster waiting to happen. Suspicious spousal email and phone hacking is nothing compared to dream hacking. Our headspace is the last refuge for privacy, but once it's made available, I'm not sure there is anyone on the planet principled and disciplined enough not to want to peek at what his or her partner has going on subconsciously. I can just imagine how many ridiculous and never-ending fights would start out with, "Why didn't you tell me you had a thing for my cousin? You think she's prettier than me, don't you?!" Or, "I thought you said you thought your coworker was gay!" Or, "I knew you shouldn't have broken up with your therapist!"
Trouble with a capital T. And that rhymes with D. And that stands for Dream Damn You, Science!
Just kidding. I think this is kind of totally amazing, and like anyone else, I'd want to give it a spin at least once. I'm just trying to anticipate the FAQs.
1. Will the dream reader be exciting? Yes.
2. Will the dream reader cause me to suffer a permanent and irreversible break from reality? Maybe.
3. Will the dream reader ruin my marriage? Probably, though results may vary.
4. Will the dream reader be too awesome to pass up in spite of questions two and three? Most likely. Just do it. You know you wanna.
Frankly, I'm most interested in using it on my dog. He's always barking and chewing and running in his sleep. In all likelihood, he's mauling a squirrel. But what if his consciousness goes far beyond what he lets on during the day (low), and he's ballroom dancing or cooking a gourmet meal or philosophizing on the meaning of life? I'd just really like to know for sure.
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Dear Readers: While I am rarely at a loss for words, I'm always grateful for column ideas. Please feel free to e-mail me your suggestions.
Nina Pajak is a writer and publishing professional living with her husband on the Upper West Side.
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