A lighthearted look at news, events, culture and everyday life in New York. The opinions expressed are solely those of the writer.
By Nina Pajak
Okay, okay. So, it snowed. In some places, a lot. In others, not a lot. BUT IT STILL SNOWED. And even half an inch is half an inch too much on March 26th! The correct amount of snow would have been zero inches. No points awarded. So sorry, we lose. There is a consolation prize, though, depending on how you choose to view circumstances.
Listen, try not to see this as a setback, but as an opportunity. “Whaaaaa?” you might say. Sure! While the winds blow and bluster though they should be tickling us with a warm, gentle breeze; while the ground remains frozen where it should be damp and fertile; while snow is falling where there should be big, fat raindrops, I spy second chances.
A second chance at a guilt-free day spent indoors, exclusively in fleece lounge pants. Does spring afford us such repulsive luxuries? No, it does not.
Oh, did you perhaps want to eat one more gigantic bowl of spaghetti while you can still remain ensconced in an oversized, chunky wool sweater? Dig in! Eat up! You have been granted a few more blissful days until you are forced to consider donning a garment that would expose those fleshy, veal-like body parts to the unforgiving rays of the sun. Go on, have another! Enjoy yourself while you can.
Were you planning to begin running or another heinously painful exercise program as soon as the weather got nicer? Well, it’s not nicer. It’s . . . meaner. Don’t turn that dial. Consider this a stay of execution.
Been promising yourself, your spouse, your roommate, or your neighbors that you’d embark on a massive spring cleaning? I mean, massive. Like, you’re not just going to weed out the old clothing from your closet, you’re going to finally figure out a way to dispose of your collection of unpaired mittens and broken down landscaping equipment. You’re seriously going to delve into that closet full of “memento” cocktail napkins and malfunctioning umbrellas. Well, jolly hoarder, throw another piece of junk on the pile and bask in it for a while. Or, you know, until maybe this weekend.
Made a bunch of New Year’s resolutions you haven’t quite gotten around to yet? Well, there’s pretty much no shot at focusing on those when the weather is nice, but as long as it still seems like winter, they count. Or maybe you made some plans to catch up on various books, movies and shows during the housebound months. Get busy! Seriously, if you haven’t seen Breaking Bad in its entirety yet, you deserve every single spoiler you’ve got coming to you.
This is not to say I prefer winter to spring. I detest winter. I loathe it. If I have to spend one more week faced with the choice between being cooped up inside or chilled to the bone outside, I will lose my ever loving mind. Perhaps I already have, and that’s why I’m suddenly seeing the bright side. Must be.
Nina Pajak is a writer living with her husband, daughter and dog in Queens. Connect with Nina on Twitter!