Jared Max Would Like To Wish You An Improbable Thanksgiving

By Jared Max
» More Columns

"Hey, if I don't speak to you before then, have a happy Thanksgiving."

We have been saying it for days. Maybe weeks. What does this mean?

Happy Thanksgiving? I desire an improbable Thanksgiving. I want to witness family drama. Somebody's pregnant! Someone's coming out of the closet! I want to see a wardrobe malfunction at halftime of every NFL game. I want to see Leon Lett bellyflop onto a Phil Luckett-flipped coin, bouncing between heads and tails.

Improbability is the active ingredient in our most delicious moments. It's the same in life as in sports. We desire what we cannot expect.

Think about the seemingly impossible catch made by Giants receiver Odell Beckham Jr. against the Cowboys this past Sunday night. While most will not remember the game many years from now -- aside from the fact that it was another loss in a lost season for the Giants -- we will recall this catch. The legend may grow with time. After all, Beckham combined the super powers of David Tyree and Dwight Clark and mixed them with a touch of Ahmad Rashad.

Unlike Tyree's catch -- a microcosm of the improbability of the Giants' Super Bowl XLII win over the Patriots -- Clark's reception at the base of the end zone which sent the 49ers to Super Bowl XVI or Rashad's snagging of a last-second Hail Mary that granted the Vikings the 1980 NFC Central title, Beckham's one-handed touchdown led to nothing. It occurred in a regular-season game. A regular-season loss. The catch, though, was so spectacular that it overshadowed the result; it may be the rookie's legacy, regardless of future accomplishments.

Improbability is the central, most flavorful element in sports stories.

Why are the Islanders on the radar of New York sports fans for the first time since the moon was discovered? Improbability. Why was there national interest in the Kansas City Royals playing in the World Series? Improbability. 1980 U.S. Olympic hockey team? Improbability. Linsanity? Improbability. 1954 Milan High School basketball team that inspired the movie "Hoosiers?" Improbability. Rocky Balboa knocking out Clubber Lang and Ivan Drago? Improbability.

Not only did Beckham Jr. become a mythical sports figure on Sunday night, but he became an improbable story again 24 hours later. At an autograph signing on Long Island, Giants receiver Victor Cruz was upstaged by a member on the undercard. While Cruz's signature cost $69, Beckham's Hancock remained the pre-catch price of $39. For an extra 10 bucks, fans could get the Giants' rookie to inscribe the Steiner-printed color photos with "Bend it Like Beckham" or "Greatest Catch Ever."

Before last Sunday, collectors probably thought $39 for a Beckham autograph was a ripoff. After his improbable touchdown catch, it may have been a bigger steal than the catch itself.

Again, Improbability.

Conversely, predictability is uninteresting. I already know what will happen at my family feast on Thursday. I know which family member will be the first to fall asleep on the couch. I know who will be the first person to get drunk. Now, if somehow these two people trade places, this Thanksgiving will become more memorable.

One year between turkey and dessert, my uncle told my grandmother that her house was going to be sold so she could move to a smaller residence. My grandmother got so upset that she needed to leave immediately and was driven home by two of my cousins. I remember that Thanksgiving. I also remember my grandma loving her new home.

Again, improbability.

Two of the NFL's most memorable Thanksgivings were born improbably, courtesy of Cowboys lineman Leon Lett and referee Phil Luckett.

Following a blocked field-goal attempt on a snow-covered field in Dallas in November of 1993, Lett bumbled and fumbled a Cowboys victory to the Dolphins. On Turkey Day in 1998, Luckett jumbled the words "heads and tails" before he tumbled the Steelers to sudden death.

While unhappy birthdays and anniversaries can benefit from others' standard well-wishes, Thanksgiving is the last holiday that needs a boost. Even when personalized, "Happy Thanksgiving" sounds like a nondescript, easy way out of telling others how we appreciate them. Instead of conveying specific feelings of gratitude, we trick ourselves into believing there is a nobility in saying "Happy Thanksgiving".

With this, I wish you and yours a safe, improbable Thanksgiving. One way to make it different is to avoid saying those crutch words. Instead, tell each loved one why you're grateful for them. Lay it on thick, too. Festivus is right around the corner. There'll be plenty of time for the airing of grievances.

Jared Max is a multi-award winning sportscaster. He hosted a No. 1 rated New York City sports talk show, "Maxed Out" — in addition to previously serving as longtime Sports Director at WCBS 880, where he currently anchors weekend sports. Follow and communicate with Jared on Twitter @jared_max.

You May Also Be Interested In These Stories