The only right way to teach a boy to become a man is to buy him and his friends lap dances in between frames. And pizza. A bowling party without pizza is like a skating party without prostitutes.
A new controversy is brewing when it comes to PE class in schools.
It’s a dark time in America when a citizen’s mini-pig ownership is called into question.
The most horrifying newsy story in the news this week is that of the Carnival cruise trip from hell.
A short follow-up piece in yesterday’s New York Times Bucks blog blew my mind.
The Girl Scouts of America do not approve of parents selling their kids’ cookies in the office.
I mean. What? This is a devastating bit of news, if you ask me.
The good news: A study out of the University of Washington which reveals that beer = healthy.
Boy, if it wasn’t for that Clydesdale making me cry real, salty tears in the fourth quarter, I’d have lost all faith in the power of fabulous beer advertising. Remember the Budweiser frogs? Seriously, I cried real tears. It was good.
From Duchess Catherine’s perfect nose to an allegedly “gay” dog and cocaine diapers at JFK, this week was anything short of slow, news-wise.
Now the MTA is exploring a number of options to prevent that prediction from coming true, including protective barriers that would make it nearly impossible for a person to get anywhere near the tracks before the subway is safely in the station.
Consider this your weekly “gag-me-with-a-spoon” newsbreak. PepsiCo, manufacturer of Gatorade drinks, has voluntarily decided to stop including Brominated Vegetable Oil (BVO) in its products due in part to “consumer feedback.”
Another week come and gone, this one marked by a presidential inauguration, subzero temperatures the likes of which can freeze dog pee in mid-stream and make me wish I lived in California, and a host of ignominious stories and half-baked scandals.
As I’ve mentioned, Mr. Pajak, Gus and I are in the midst of searching across boroughs and rivers and expressways for an apartment that can adequately house our growing family without bankrupting us or forcing us to live in a nether region to which only the G train will go.
Fine. This isn’t new news. It made headlines in 2012, which in Internet years, is equal to totally five bazillion years ago. But it’s new to me. And maybe to you, too.
This has been a stellar week for dubious or otherwise ignominiously remarkable news stories. Let’s dive right in, shall we?
The numbers don’t lie. It really is worse this year. But I can’t help but snort a little at stories of youth soccer leagues banning high fives. Are they crazy? Am I jaded? Yes.