Replacement Ref Vs. Mom’s New Boyfriend, Mark
- SalaryMakes $8.40/hour.Makes $8.40/hour.
- Financial PlanningDesperately saving money for Christmas, knowing full well that this gig could end at any second.Drank away all of this year's Christmas money already, keeps saying "Oh God, don't tell your mom, it'll be our little secret, OK? Don't tell your mother…Please?"
- ImageAwfully patches a sport's soul.Sports an awful soul patch.
- GoalsTries to buy LeSean McCoy’s affection with pleas of Fantasy Football glory.Tries to buy your affection with poorly-thought out gifts.
- EducationFailed out of University of Phoenix.Failed out of University of Phoenix.
- Means of TransportationTakes the bus, probably.Drives a Kia.
- ExperienceHas a complete lack of big game experience, which serves to further endanger both the quality and the sanctity of American's true game - that brutal ballet known as Professional Football.Not real dad.
The ref wins!