Experts: Putting Sex In Writing Could Make Your Union Even Stronger

NEW YORK (CBSNewYork) — A new trend has some couples turning to lawyers to help save their relationships.

“I promise you that I am going to be making sure that you’re having more fun, more dates, and more time of mine,” Gregg Sullivan told his wife, Toni Mantus.

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But unlike many of the promises made during a relationship, this one is part of a written contract. The couple told CBS 2’s Dick Brennan that, with the help of an attorney, they have put everything in writing, including how often they have sex.

“You want to try for once or twice a week. It’s nice to have a contract and say, look, we did agree to this,” explained sex therapist and marriage counselor Gracie Landes.

Landes told CBS 2 that the agreements are growing in popularity with both married and unmarried couples but that not everybody is on board with the idea of scheduling sex.

“That’s like putting paperwork into something that’s really supposed to be natural,” said one woman.

While many people were concerned about the loss of spontaneity that could come with a contract, experts said that the agreements come with some bonuses.

“I have found there can be a lot of joy in having structure and knowing what’s going to happen,” Landes explained.

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Mantus and Sullivan had their relationship provisions drawn up by their attorney as part of their prenuptial agreement.

“We’re seeing the evolution of so called ‘lifestyle clauses,’ which really answer the question, what do we want the marriage to be like? What types of activities are we going to be engaging in? Where are we going on vacation?” explained attorney Ann Margaret Carrozza.

Enforcement of the contracts is not guaranteed.

“If someone wants a sex schedule, two times a week, or three times a week, I can’t take that agreement into a courtroom and ask that it be enforced,” Carrozza explained.

The agreements are not not legally binding, according to experts,  but serve as a symbolic way to bind couples.

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