Nina In New York: A Shockingly Fond Farewell To Taxi TV

A lighthearted look at news, events, culture and everyday life in New York. The opinions expressed are solely those of the writer.
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By Nina Pajak

It is done. The Taxi and Limousine Commission hath spoken, and Taxi TVs are officially outta here. We're getting an upgrade, and those obnoxious, blaring, ridiculous irritants will be but a mere pockmark in the many-textured history of our city. Huzzah! Hip, hip, hooray and all that! Right? Are you with me?

From Metro: "Most riders outside of Brooklyn and Manhattan actually welcome the TVs on taxi backseats, a poll found Monday."

You guys. Come on.

According to a Quinnipiac University poll across all five boroughs, only those who live in Manhattan responded in a vast majority that they'd like the TVs removed. On the other hand, in the outer boroughs where apparently we molder in isolation and abject boredom, we came out in favor of keeping them. In the Bronx and Queens, the vote wasn't even close. And in fact, in the Bronx, Queens and Staten Island, we laid it all on the line and said that we find the screens to be "a pleasant diversion" as opposed to "an annoyance."

This leads me to a variety of emotional responses, and I feel the need to defend my fellow boroughmen. Perhaps we are not as jaded and sophisticated as our island-dwelling brethren. Perhaps we lack the same access to taxis and the funds to patronize them quite so frequently, making the idea of television sets in the backseats of public transportation seem more charming than annoying. Perhaps our cable service isn't as robust way, way out here. But . . . no. Just, no. How can this be? It simply must be wrong. You are all on your phones in the backseats of taxis anyway! There is absolutely no way that watching the same Dos Caminos commercial fifteen times in as many minutes can come close to anything resembling a "pleasant diversion." That's just science.

On the bright side, the poll also asked New Yorkers about issues like minimum wage for fast food workers, which everyone came out for in large majorities. Phew. Feelings are mixed about Uber and whether the city should limit its coverage, which comes as no surprise because this whole thing is confusing and murky and who can even know the long-term implications of these mobile app car services? Nobody. But here is what I do know: Uber cars have no televisions, are pleasant. Taxis have televisions, are unpleasant. Uber cars come within moments of the push of a button. Available green cabs are like fairies or Santa's elves: we all want them to exist, and we know the world would be magical if only we could see one. Ah, well. It's nice to have something to believe in.

Nina Pajak is a writer living with her husband, daughter and dog in Queens. Connect with Nina on Twitter!