Nina In New York: Gender Equality Needs To Start From The Bottom(s) Up
A lighthearted look at news, events, culture and everyday life in New York. The opinions expressed are solely those of the writer.
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By Nina Pajak
Recently, our family has embarked on the adventure that is potty training our first child. As anyone knows who has already experienced this magical journey, every little bit helps. Including underwear selection. But it isn't just underwear. It's BRAND NEW SPECIAL BIG GIRL SUPER DUPER BIG GIRL DID I SAY SPECIAL UNDIES!!!! They're special, all right. They're exciting. It's kind of a big deal.
And so it was with this in mind that I took a solo trip to Target to select some new underwear sets for my toddler. I put a couple of Disney princess sets into my basket, but I needed more (not every pair makes it to a second wearing, sadly). I turned my attention to the non-pink rack that was princess-adjacent, realizing I'd been unfairly ignoring it. Why shouldn't my daughter want to wear Ninja Turtle underwear? They're colorful and fun. Or superheroes? Of course! We are modern gals in a modern world which is constantly striving for greater gender equality and the shedding of outdated social constructs. I was about to put Leonardo, Donatello and the gang on top of Elsa and Anna when my friend posed a question:
"Those say 'Boys' on them. Is there any difference in the cut, do you think?"
Sure enough, when I inspected the package more closely I discovered that they were, in fact, cut specifically for little boys. And sure enough again, as I went through the rack I discovered that there was not a single non-pink set that didn't require male equipment for usage. Even Mickey Mouse was deemed only suitable for those blessed with a Y chromosome.
On a mission, we moved from the relatively small toddler section to the much more plentiful display of youth sizes. There, I was initially relieved to find Ninja Turtles and superheroes hanging among the princesses and "Palace Pets."
"Look!" I exclaimed, triumphantly snatching them from the hook. Only, no. The Ninja Turtles were recast in shades of pink and purple. The superheroes were the glittery, female counterparts of the classics. Some other members of the boys' club were there, only they, too, were all superimposed against a frilly, pastel backdrop.
Of course, it makes sense that boys and girls would need different cuts to be comfortable. But is there some rule that says a girl can't learn to use the potty if she isn't wearing frilly panties? Where does this idea come from, that a person literally has to have a penis in order to appreciate Disney's Cars? That a kid needs specific genitalia to accidentally make a poop on Donald Duck? The lack of gender-neutral children's items is nothing new, but this is crap. Truly.
We've come so far in the fight for equal recognition and treatment of women. But what does all that high level work really mean when, at the end of the day, at the bottom of it all, on the most basic, stripped down level (get it? get it?), we're still raising our children with the same, old, stifling values? We've got a long way to go. But now I've got to go, because my daughter's got to go. Otherwise, Cinderella's in for an unhappy surprise.
Nina Pajak is a writer living with her husband, daughter and dog in Queens. Connect with Nina on Twitter!
