Coronavirus Update: Social Distancing Is Especially Hard On Huggers, And There's A Scientific Reason Why
NEW YORK (CBSNewYork) - Phone calls and video chats are helping us connect with family and friends during this time of social distancing.
But for many, a virtual hug is a poor substitute for the real thing, and it turns out there's science behind the need for heartfelt human touch.
"It's just an emptiness, an emptiness," said Yonkers resident Lori Garbin.
Garbin hasn't hugged her mom since the first weekend in March. The last time she was able to visit 90-year-old Mary Kirby before her Riverdale nursing home went into coronavirus lockdown.
"Had I known I would have given her a much much bigger hug before I left!" Lori said.
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"You give good hugs, I know because you've been giving me hugs for more than 20 years!" said CBS2's Tony Aiello.
"Ha! Yes!" Lori said.
Aiello and his wife count Lori and Mark Garbin among their closest friends. She's a hugger.
"It's a way of saying for me that you mean something to me, that you matter to me," Lori said.
Many will understand the pain she feels at not being able to hug her mom.
"A connection - a love, her smell, the softness of her skin," Lori said.
Researchers say there is power in human touch, and hugs can heal. Endocrinologist Dr. David Fryburg of EnvisionKindness.org wrote about it for Psychology Today.
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"People need to be hugged, need to be touched," Fryburg said. "There are studies about hugs affecting viral infectivity, affecting mood, affecting response to stress."
Dr. Fryburg says during social distancing, it may help to look at a picture of a loved one, and think about the times you have hugged.
"And reflect on them with gratitude rather than with loss," he said.
"You don't realize how much you miss it until you can't get it anymore," Lori said.
"This too shall pass and someday we'll hug again," Aiello said.
"I hope so - until then - virtual hug!" Lori said.
The emoji is sweet, but no substitute for the real thing.
