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Gotham Gossipist: ‘The Situation’ Reportedly Goes to Rehab

FILE - In this Nov. 17, 2010 photo, Mike "The Situation" Sorrentino poses at GQ magazine's 2010 "Men of the Year" party in Los Angeles. (AP Photo/Chris Pizzello)

FILE – In this Nov. 17, 2010 photo, Mike “The Situation” Sorrentino poses at GQ magazine’s 2010 “Men of the Year” party in Los Angeles. (AP Photo/Chris Pizzello)

Let’s face it, rehab is bound to happen for everyone involved in MTVs ‘Jersey Shore’ cast, that being said, TMZ is reporting that ‘The Situation,’ aka Mike Sorrentino, is the first to take the plunge toward recovery.

According to a TMZ source, Sorrentino is suffering from an undisclosed substance abuse issue.  Perhaps the list is so extensive it would be tedious to name individually.  A representative for the abs reality star  would neither confirm nor deny that he is, in fact, at a rehab facility, but said that the Sitch “has spent the past several weeks at an undisclosed location for much needed rest and recuperation after his extensive production and appearance schedule.”

So, he’s either at a yoga retreat or Cirque Lounge.  Same thing, varied amounts  of night sweats and stretching.

The Huffington Post hints that Sorrentino’s rehab may be of a totally different variety, suggesting that he may be bowing out of public scrutiny while rumors of his sexuality continue to circulate.  The rumors, started by co-stars Snooki and J-Woww, have been denied by Sorrentino’s friend ‘The Unit  (One really must wonder how they come up with these nicknames), saying “That’s ridiculous. If he’s gay, then he would be covering up on a huge basis for many, many years. That’s ridiculous. There’s absolutely zero truth to that, and I know that firsthand.”

That settles it, no one has ever hid their sexuality for years!

For his part, Sorrentino seems more concerned about marketing, than dating.  A show insider told the Chicago Sun Times that The Situation was increasingly frustrated with the persistence of these rumors,

“He’s extremely upset,” added the source, noting that  Sorrentino is concerned those comments could hurt his brand marketing efforts, which are very much focused on straight male customers.

Whether it’s weed, whiskey, or worry it looks like The Situation has finally had enough.  Take a load of Mike, and maybe lay off the tanning–it’s bad for you.