Why Do Men Cheat? NYC Relationship Expert Sounds Off On Arnold Schwarzenegger’s Infidelity

NEW YORK (CBSNewYork) — New Yorkers know a thing or two about the cheating hearts of politicians.

Like many powerful men, Arnold Schwarzenegger probably thinks rules don’t apply to him, says Dr. Anne-Renée Testa, author of “The Bully In Your Relationship.”

1010 WINS’ Mona Rivera reports: Lifestyles Of The Rich And Salacious

The former California governor has come clean and admitted that he fathered a child with a member of his household staff.

Related: Celebrity Break Ups | Notorious Political Sex Scandals

Schwarzenegger said it happened more than a decade ago and that he told his wife, Maria Shriver, about it earlier this year after leaving the governor’s office.

“He became the terminator of his own marriage,” Testa told 1010 WINS’ Mona Rivera. “The idea is, ‘I’m never going to be found out.’ I do believe that he was pushed to the wall and that’s why he came out with it. You can’t keep a secret like that forever.”

The couple announced their separation last week with little explanation but Shriver has not been living in their gated Brentwood home for weeks.

They have been married for 25 years and have four children. Shriver has stood by her husband in the past when he was accused of harassment while running for governor in 2003.

Published reports say the mother of  Schwarzenegger’s child retired in January  after working for the family for over 20 years.

Shriver is calling the revelations “painful and heartbreaking.”

Get more on the separation from our sister station CBS Sacramento

So what exactly makes men in power, like former President Bill Clinton and former New York Gov. Eliot Spitzer, cheat on their spouses?

“It’s about hubris, when a man thinks he can get away with it because he’s in such a high place that nothing can stop him and no one is going to come forward,” Testa said.

She believes IMF Chief Dominique Strauss-Kahn, who is accused of sexually assaulting a maid in a Midtown hotel, is another example but believes he is operating under a different standard.

“In Europe, they don’t think twice about things like this,” Testa claims.

What do you think? Sound off below…

More from Mona Rivera
  • Kerri M.

    It happens. If your not a cheater then your right in your expectations to not be cheated on by the one Ur with in a relationship with. Don’t blame urself for another person’s actions. Guilty parties are well known for their twisted guilt trips they push on the innocent for their wrong doings to be excused. The road to hell is paved with denial. If your in a relationship and your intuition tells you your being cheated on, then you most likely are ~ you may want to excuse it with benefit of doubt or lane defenses on the guilty party’s behalf but that’s just low self esteem/ your wounded ego talking… Your not jealous – you just don’t want to admit truth. You are lovable , just not by that person. Get over it, Cuz U are worth it! Their cheating has nothing to do with u- Ur weight- polishing them- it’s all about lifestyle & a self will free choice on character . Be proud of who you are and what u stand for and let them be them. Ur not desperate. Be happy – if u miss them… Just send a post card later to them – addressed to somewhere in hell. The dev will deliver it to em wherever he got em stationed @

  • desperate housewife

    Enough for the myth that for men, cheating is all about sex: About 8 percent of men said that sexual dissatisfaction was the main factor in their infidelity. “Our culture tells us that all men need to be happy is sex,” Neuman says. Men are emotionally driven beings too. They want their wives to show them that they’re appreciated, and they want women to understand how hard they’re trying to get things right.. Problem is that men are less likely than women to express these feelings, so you won’t always know when your guy is in need of a little affirmation.

  • dee cee

    The major difference between Arnold and the IMF guy with infidelity is rape and consent of both parties.., whether or not the general population has acceptance… cares if a married man cheats or not.



  • Jim

    Remember NJ Governor Jim McGreevey hiring Golan Cipel as head of
    Homeland Security after 9/11?

    Then everything unraveled. Almost gave his dad a heart attack and certainly
    destroyed the family and marriage. What a bitter divorce!

  • Roy

    Men cheat for the same reasons women cheat……sex is fun,sex is good.that’s it plain and simple;

  • The Other Side

    Ok…let’s hear some comments from cheating wives or girlfriends….

  • lol

    chinese proverb say:

    woman who banish husband to doghouse
    will soon find him in cathouse

  • suzie's f-stick

    i love to cheat with my girlfriend of three years. my wife is cold since menopause nd has zero interest. my girlfrields husband is not very articulate and boring. we found each other and rock our worlds. since our spouses are losers, let them suffer probably knowing that both of us are unfaithful. my wife is such a wimp, she cant argue with me. i dont even care is she finds out.
    btw… i am not a fat bastid.im a 52 year old dude who is in shape because i work out five days a week and at a perfert weight for my 5’10” frame

    • SM

      I’m not your wife, but I could be. However I’m not “cold” as you say. For years my husband bullied me into having sex every night whether I wanted to or not. He would pout and generally act bad if I said I didn’t want to for whatever reason. He behaves in this childish way every time he doesn’t get his way. My mistake, and I admit it is mine, is that I eventually decided that I was easier to give in than to deal with the crybaby. Now it’s an obligation, and I resent it every night, especially when it’s late and I have to get up at 5:30 AM the next day. I know that he is cheating on me with a much-younger woman. Why do I stay? Well, he is a terrific father. I don’t know what I’m going to do when our youngest goes away to college, though. I know there is blame on both sides here. My point is, women don’t just “become” cold. It’s NOT just menopause. Think about it.

      • J R

        You think a bullying whining childish rapist is a “Terrific father”? Get your butt out of this marriage now. You childern will not melt into puddles if their rapist father isnt in their lives all the time. How can he be if he cheats as well?. Your childern will respect you for it. They will realize what the man really is. Childern are more aware of what goes on than you think. Do not say you stay for financial reasons. New York State Support Collection Unit is very good at garinishing wages. Remember you allow the behavior to happen. YOU ARE ENABELING HIM!!!. Let his youer honey deal with him. Once a cheater always a cheater. Get on with your life….

  • suzie's f-stick

    i love to cheat with my girlfriend of three years. my wife is cold since menopause nd has zero interest. my girlfrields husband is not very articulate and boring. we found each other and rock our worlds. since our spouses are losers, let them suffer probably knowing that both of us are unfaithful. my wife is such a wimp, she cant argue with me. i dont even care is she finds out.
    btw… i am not a fat bastid.im a 52 year old dude who is in shape because i work out five days a week and at a perfert weight for my 5’10” frame

    • RNYC2011

      Yeah, right. You’re probably some fat, zit-faced slob and your “girlfriend” has been beaten by the ugly stick at least once or twice. But enjoy the fantasy.

  • robertg

    Because they aren’t getting what they need from their wives.

  • MDWhite

    It’s a well known fact that the only reason husbands cheat is because they’re pigs and that the only reason wives cheat is because their husbands are pigs.

    Ah, women. Gotta love ’em. Absolutely no sense of accountability or perspective and a breathtaking inability to parallel park.

  • Louise Dubin

    Dr. Testa’s anti-European comment at the end of the article is an embarrassment to the medical profession, to women, and to new yorkers.

  • jtorres

    No one is going to want to marry you with your attitude. Talk about raving lunatics…

  • Dale Auburn

    Men cheat for the same reason women cheat – because THEY CAN.

  • Sara

    For Strauss-Kahn, nothing’s proven yet and what does that mean “In Europe, they don’t think twice about things like this”???

    • Hope this helps


      It means that they think about it once, then go on to thinking about other stuff.

  • Oh Blah Dee Blah Dah

    Men, and women, cheat because they are not getting enough sex or the kind of sex that they need from their spouses.

  • Vienna Joe

    Why does this female psychologist only address “why men cheat on their spouses”? Women cheat on their spouses also, is she unaware of this fact or is she in denial?

  • Tina

    People cheat because they have a lack of self control, integrity, and self respect.
    People cheat because they have a lack of respect and commitment to their marriages and spouses.
    It doesn’t matter what’s missing at home. The key is to invest effort into making your marriage work, not acting like an animal.

    • Tina

      Well, I never!

    • jc

      WELL SAID!!! Blaming it on the other person is rationalization.

  • Vic

    Simple: men cheat because there’s something missing at home. Women cheat for the same reason. Maybe communication is lost. Maybe one feels neglected. Happy content spouses who would give their left arm before cheating on their spouses don’t stray. But at the same time, if you’re not happy why be miserable. Leave before making mistakes. And if you can’t leave because it’s “cheaper to keep her” then be dang well sure you don’t profess your undying love for that “other” person because you know dang well you’re not leaving home. Happens every day and it’s negative wherever you look at it.

  • kendra

    i don,t like him anyway,but back to the topic at hand the reason why men and women sheat is there is know structure in the relationship and everyone has the denteny to foorget about open communication so that is one of the main reasons that the opposite sex cheats on each other cause they don,t know how to become trusting of 1 another also so there we have it.

    • Just axin'

      What does ‘denteny’ mean?

  • Dottie Gallardo

    hahhahaa the Sperminator!!!! Busted.

  • Anthony

    The article failed to mention John Edwards. He might have been the biggest skunk of all of them. Edwards banged up another women when he knew his wife was dying of cancer.

  • None Of Your Business

    Well, it’s always heartening to see another stunning example of what the Republicans mean when they say ‘family values.’ By the way, what are Bristol and Levi up to these days?

    • Joey

      Duh, at least Republicans have family values. That’s why this is even an issue in yo head

      • ham07

        yes republican family values = hypocrites.

      • ironmike

        Yeah, too bad Arnold wasn’t a solid family man like Spitzer or McSkeevy. Dems obviously are more honorable spouses.

    • MDWhite

      Arnie was as much a Republican as you are an astronaut. Speaking about family values…gotta love that extended Obama family, huh?

      And, of course, lest we forget little Johnny Edwards, Teddy Kennedy and Bill “Prof. Hummer” Clinton.

      As for Bristol and Levi…unlike you, they at least know who their fathers and mothers are.

      • ham07

        yes their mom and pop are:
        Alaskin redneck and trailor park mom so at least we know the pedigree. time to to *snip* *snip* to prevent contaminating the gene pool.

  • Patricia Warmoth

    I think Dr. Tesla has a personal issue with men, and perhaps had problems in her relationships. Perhaps her Dad cheated on her mother. As for the IMF Chief, he should be innocent until proven guilty. Unfortunately women are always waiting on the sidelines to hook a wealthy man or set them up. Especially with the economy as it is. Look at Trump, does he have to take a woman by force? They are always a line waiting. I do not think that the IMF head would have to rape or force a woman to get some… I hope this woman is not setting him up to get back at the treatment that France has been giving Muslims recently. If she is setting him up, I hope she pays for it. She said that she had no idea who he was. Don’t bet on it. I had had a special guest coming to my hotel, every one would be informed.

    • jtorres

      First of all, The Donald cheated on every one of his wives. We don’t yet know about this one. He never had to take a woman “by force” because he’s not a rapist. Rapists are not always some ugly degenerate in a trench coat hiding in an alley. Remember Ted Bundy? Again, rape is not about sex, it’s about power — that’s why there’s always force and violence involved. Many rich powerful men think they can do whatever they want and use whomever they want in the boardroom and in the bedroom. What’s more, this is a high end hotel where suites go for over $3000 a night. I’m sure he was not the only rich, powerful guest there. Besides, I had never heard of him before this. Had you?

  • KerryMcAllen

    Hey I believe one of your own, Jim Nantz, cheated after ove 25 years of marriage, which became public. Why don’t you add him to your list?

    • KPMc

      Nice catch, Kerry… but you can’t expect CBS to be objective and point to things that might embarrass them. That might be mistaken for proper journalism. Also… great name. Are you from the NYC area?

  • Gregory Miller

    More women in public life should confront the public that the child she bore was not from her husband. With gender equality the goal –it only seems fair to present the other side of the coin. However this does not seem to be the norm.

  • Lahoma Gringer

    Maybe the wife was withholding nookie? If so, not good.

  • http://zagwee.wordpress.com zagwee

    I guess Arnolds new title should hte “Impregnator” lol.


    • rma

      Naw, too many men already claim that name…:0)

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