NEW YORK (WLNY) — Let’s talk about love – finding it, and keeping it.

What are the rules? Men and women don’t always agree. The Couch brought in relationship experts Siggy Flicker and Rich Santos to boil it down.

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We started by talking about the old school rule, which says men always have to approach a woman first.

Flicker and Santos both agree this is dated and just plain not true. Women can make the first move.

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“That doesn’t mean if you’re a woman you have to attack a man,” said Flicker. It just means to smile, open yourself up, let him know you’re interested…everything is with the eyes.”

The goal is to be accessible. One of the biggest mistakes single folks make is closing themselves off.

“They don’t look up,” said Flicker. “You walk down the street in New York City, and everybody’s on their BlackBerries or iPhones and nobody looks up, and they wonder ‘Why am I still single?’ Well this is why.”

As for the males, Santos said the mistakes come in the form of two extremes.

“Either coming on too strong, or looking like he doesn’t care enough,” Santos said. “It’s a balancing act. If you honestly are into someone, just act that way.”

Flicker agreed.

“If everyone would just lead with their truest self, just be who you are, it’s very, very easy. It’s all about chemistry.”

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